Friday, February 12, 2010

Oh, TV what happened?

This Blog is rated M for Mature.

"I have never yet met a man that I dident [sic] like,"-Will Rogers, 1926

"I never met a tv I didn't like"-Me, circa 1988

Boy, a lot has changed over the years, and nowadays I'm more likely to call my old friend an asshole(the tv, not Will Rogers)

The idea for this blog came to me in the shower, a place where a lot of my ideas come to me, when I'm doing something mundane and not paying any attention, these things pop in my head.

This also happens while I'm driving, eating and shock of shocks-watching television.

This was really inspired by an article concerning the final episode of "The Jay Leno Show" on NBC.

You remember that so called colossal failure (That still drew decent ratings, but not the absolute highest) that got the ax this past Tuesday.

Apparently it didn't even draw the ratings that a encore presentation of Law And Order:SVU did on Wednesday-an episode that had already been aired TWICE.

It garnered 2 million extra viewers than Jay's show(on a given night-don't forget to read the fine print, folks)

In actuality it just grazed past Leno for his finale-but the headline doesn't want you to know that.

Who sent out this release? NBC?

What really irks me is that when this episode originally air on October 21, 2009, it was repeated 3 NIGHTS LATER on October 24th, 2009.


So while Jay looks to be the loser, what does it say about us as viewers who get Law & Order episodes spoon fed to us with alarming regularity and we eat them like candy?

Can't get enough Law & Order:SVU on NBC? Don't forget to tune into USA Network for the Big Law & Order:SVU Marathon this weekend! For 16 HOURS OF LAW & FUCKING ORDER! Don't Forget this is just one series in a franchise of LAW & ORDER.

How about some LAW & ORDER for television programming in general?

You can bet your bippy that someone, somewhere is going to watch EVERY SINGLE EPISODE of this show. I don't care if you like it. I like NCIS, but Dear Lord, we're battling obesity in America and they blame it on the food?

You can eat all the granola and rice cakes you want, but it won't save your big ass if you watch Television for 16 hours-Don't give us a reason guys.

The networks are as lazy as we are.

Every Summer, there is now a "Worldwide Day of Play" usually in September, where the tv execs have decided that we the people, need to get off our ass and go outside and do something!

You know it's getting bad when they have to run that across the screen and go dark for 3 hours.

Now we don't want to wear the little tikes out, since this is only a once a year thing, so let's make it 3 hours.

Trouble is, when they come back in-Spongebob Squarepants Marathon!! Thank God! I almost broke a sweat out there!

The point is, that with repeats, threepeats, marathons and what have you, television is really becoming that "vast wasteland" the snobs spoke of back in the day.

This is of course a cost cutting measure because a couple of pricks got the green light to go out and buy every damn station they wanted.

Who says you can't have it all?

So when one or two companies own everything, then you get programming aimed at getting the absolute highest demographic out there and influenced by the same handful of people.

Sure, television has always been about ratings, but how on earth did the stations survive when a Full House repeat only aired once a day?

It's a surprise Disney is still in business huh?

While it may seem trite, with everything else going on in the world, I think someone that cares and has power should break up these monopolies and put the networks up for grabs to anyone that cares about what they do.

Think about all the jobs it would create, people actually going back to work and producing, editing, programming and making magic.

You think Disney gives a Mickey Mouses ass if their channels are entertaining you? No, we apparently watch anyway.

I say, By God, if you're gonna make Lucky Charms good for me, then make VH1 good for me-if anyone still knows how.

Now if you'll excuse me I'm gonna go watch just 1 episode of Benson, and go out and play.